tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17261395573228646942024-02-20T11:09:35.757-08:00Confessions: What's on my Mind!Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.comBlogger16125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-37643335846437113522014-09-15T06:36:00.000-07:002014-09-15T06:36:27.100-07:00The Power of QuittingI recently attended a two day retreat for team building and leadership. One of the activities of the retreat was a "Great Race" event. During this event, four teams competed in five events, with the winning team finishing first. Three of the five events were fun: assembling a puzzle, solving riddles, and a scavenger hunt.<br />
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Two of the events involved eating food that was not part of our everyday diets--foods that let's just say would make us squeemish at best or cause us the physical discomfort of vomiting at worst. In addition, the quantity of these foods was large. We were not only supposed to eat the foul-tasting stuff, we had to eat a lot of it. AND much of the food was prepared with lots of salt. Another group was supposed to consume a large quantity of sugary candy.<br />
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My team, troopers that we were, complied. We ate; we retched; and we suffered the discomforts of this event, both during and after. At the end, when the prize was being handed out (we were second, no prize--first prize was a silly statue), we were praised for our perseverance.<br />
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After I got home, I reflected on this experience. As probably the oldest in the group, I DO understand that I might be accused of being a fuddy-duddy with the explanation that these eating events were all in fun. Yet, I am a bit ashamed that I just didn't stand up and LEAD MY TEAM by saying, "No I won't make myself sick or eat things that are bad for me just to win a race."<br />
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Leadership is important, and often requires sacrifice and pain. It also requires standing up for the stupid things you are asked to do that serve no purpose. While I MAY have exhibited some small level of leadership and teamwork by going along and eating things that could have made me physically ill, I missed an even bigger opportunity to show leadership and teamwork by saying, "Hey, I appreciate all the thought that went into this event, but I politely decline to participate because I'm being asked to do something that is physically painful, possibly dangerous, not in my best interest, and serves no higher purpose than winning a race. I encourage you, the rest of my team, to do the same."<br />
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That would have been true leadership.Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-31488648946081170802013-06-02T17:01:00.001-07:002013-06-02T17:01:54.446-07:00The Boy Scout BrewhahaI am the proud mother of an Eagle Scout and the proud wife of an assistant scout master who spends hundreds of hours each year volunteering with the scouts. As a scouting parent, I am not very involved--camping, roughing it outdoors and other activities that scouts enjoy don't appeal to me. However, I KNOW Boy Scouts are about the best character forming organization there is for boys, and even for the adults who volunteer.<br />
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So--what do I think about the scouts accepting boys who admit they have a same-sex attraction? NO BIG DEAL! Scouting is NOT an organization that focuses on sex, sex education, etc. That' just not what it's all about. Scouts are expected not to engage in sexual activity outside of marriage--gay, straight or solitary sex, as part of the Scout Law. So the fear that there will be a bunch of homosexual sex happening at scouting activities is ridiculous. Are all scouts observant of this law all the time? No, but the Scout Law, like the Ten Commandments, exists to set expectations and keep the boys on track. They are accountable to it. <br />
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What do I make of all the fearful parents who are worried that their boys might be exposed to or in the company of boys with same-sex attraction? Get over it--boys with SSA are in your parishes, in schools, in gym classes, on sports teams, and in the activities that your kids engage in already. The world has not ended. There is NO reason to believe that scouting activities will be any different.<br />
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I've also heard the laughable comment that boys with SSA might discuss their "crushes" with other boys who are discussing their crushes on girls. Are you kidding me? Have the people who have expressed those concerns ever hung around boys of scouting age? I have NEVER heard a group of boys discussing their crushes--even when they don't know I'm around. It doesn't happen. These are BOYS not girls.<br />
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If a scout troop has strong adult leaders and takes the Scout Law seriously, I can't think of any better or safer place for any boy to develop character, and I can't think of a better place for boys to learn how to become the kind of men our Church and society need.<br />
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Are there legitimate things to worry about? Yes. Like many, I fear that the Boy Scouts MAY follow the culture and accept homosexual behavior as normal, okay and just another choice. I fear they may allow openly practicing homosexuals, who are engaging in sinful behavior, to become leaders. All involved in scouting must be vigilant. However, that's not happening right now.<br />
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Of course I support the rights of parents to pull their kids out of scouting, start up alternate programs, etc. But let's not jump the gun here. Scouting still is a great place for boys, and would a really tough act to follow.Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-25188262497817076662012-08-15T08:56:00.001-07:002012-08-15T09:00:34.408-07:00The Assumption and Motherly Love<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Today Catholics Celebrate the Feast of the Assumption. We believe that the mother of Jesus, Mary, was assumed into heaven body and soul. While this teaching is not in the Bible, it has been handed down from the beginnings of Christianity and is part of our sacred tradition. I wrote (or rather I believe I was given by the Holy Spirit) the following essay two years ago, and it was published in my diocesan newspaper. As I re-read it today, the feelings it evoked are just as powerful. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The Assumption and Motherly Love<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">My
mother died a few days after Christmas in 2008, and I miss her very much. Since
that time, I think often about the love and loss shared by Mary and Jesus in
their relationship as mother and son. As a result, Mary’s assumption into
heaven has taken on a profound meaning for me.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>After several years of declining health and energy, my mother spent her last six months in pain, struggling for
every breath and relied on others to help with her most basic needs. My
mother’s body, that of an athlete in her younger years, bearer of five
children, and an instrument of countless deeds of charity throughout her life,
had wasted away and failed her.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I accept her death as the beginning
of her eternal life, and believe that her soul is with our loving Father in
heaven. There have even been times when I’ve “felt” her presence, knowing that
the love and care she has for me didn’t die when she did.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>But, I still miss her physical
presence in the midst of my life. I miss her cooking and her homemade
butterscotch sauce, her hugs and kisses, and holding her hand. I miss calling
her with the latest family news and the lively political discussions she had
with my husband. I miss her down-to-earth wisdom and her interpretation of the
current events in my hometown, all punctuated by either nods of approval or
eye-rolls. I even miss the narrowing of her eyes, jutting of her chin, and the
quick bark of “Mary” when she didn’t quite of approve of something I said or
did, usually regarding my children, her grandchildren.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>After my mother’s death, I found
myself thinking more and more and about the assumption of Mary.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Before Mom died, I focused on the assumption
as a special reward for Mary. By God’s gift, she was conceived without original
sin, and as “full of grace,” gave herself completely to God’s will throughout
her life. God rewarded this total fidelity by saving her from the corruption of
the grave and gave her a “head start” on her eternal state, body and soul
united. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Now, for me, the assumption has
become a window into the heart of Jesus. Jesus longs to be with us eternally so
much that he died for us, but his death did more than offer salvation for our
souls. Catholicism teaches us that this salvation includes our bodies as well. We
will enjoy heavenly eternity in the new Jerusalem as physical beings. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>When he ascended into heaven, Jesus
preceded us in this state. As a man like us in all things but sin, did Jesus
too long for the physical presence and companionship of his mother? In heaven,
Jesus experienced of the physical separation of the person who made his life
possible, lovingly cared for him, guided him, and supported him even when she
didn’t quite understand what he was up to. Did Jesus miss hugging his mother
and holding her hand? Is the assumption also about Jesus wanting to bring Mary
into her eternal state to join <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">him </i>as
soon as her earthly life was over? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>In the parable of the prodigal son,
Jesus uses the rejoicing of a father over the return of a wayward son to
explain how God longs for our conversion:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“He ran to his son, embraced him and kissed him” (Luke 15:20). The assumption
is also a celebration of the end of separation; the joyous reunion of a mother
and son, separated for some years but now united totally, not only spiritually,
in the same physical company forever. What great joy Jesus must have felt when
he met his mother face-to-face. I find it easy to picture them running toward
each other, crying and rejoicing that they would never again be apart.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Through
the death of my mother, I know there is no earthly love or comfort that can
compensate for this loss. The pain of the separation can only be offered to God
as a sacrifice and accepted as a cross, the consequences of original sin. The assumption
reminds us that Jesus understands this longing and that we have been promised
eternal companionship, not only with him, but also with our beloved family
members who have died in his grace. </span><span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span></span><br />
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"></span><span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span></span></div>
Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-9788210786077380182012-03-26T14:37:00.000-07:002012-03-26T14:37:49.770-07:00Walking Through the Valley of DeathOn Saturday, I attending a presentation by Father Tad Pachoczyk of the<a href="http://www.ncbcenter.org/"> National Catholic Bioethics Center</a> on the end of life ethical issues. After an informative and interesting talk, he reminded the priests, deacons and lay Catholics that the best way to minister to the sick and dying is by: (a) bringing them to the sacraments; (b) guiding them to understand the value of redemptive suffering. When we unite our suffering with the suffering of Christ, it becomes a powerful force and witness.<br />
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I fear that too often we focus on cheering the sick up, trying to make them feel better--which is not a bad thing. But Father Tad reminded me that it is okay--or rather a good thing--to say, "I know you are in pain. I know you are suffering. Jesus knows that too and accepts this gift of your suffering for the salvation of souls and to promote his work on earth."<br />
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When we do that, we've helped the sick person realize that (s)he is not just a victim of illness but an agent of Christ--and that makes all the difference in the midst of suffering.<br />
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I remember being with my mother in her last days. She was in a nursing home, and there was a prayer group of residents that met weekly. At the meeting, my mother said that while they were all unable to do acts of charity, they could all pray--for each other, for families, for the needs of the world. That was their role and purpose during this time in their lives. She really got it, and I was proud.Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-54460089133515787872012-02-04T09:53:00.000-08:002012-02-04T09:53:59.219-08:00Planned Parenthood is Boorish and Rude/Komen is a Coward<h6 class="uiStreamMessage" data-ft="{"type":1}" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}">As somebody who spends a lot of time writing grant requests for a Catholic organization, I have to tell you, Planned Parenthood could use a bit of humility. No organization is ENTITLED to a grant. If an organization would like funding, it makes its case and hopes its goals, values and organization align with those of the foundation. How rude, boorish and unprofessional Planned Parenthood was when it was told "no." Instead of saying, "Thank you for funding us all these years, maybe in the future we can have a meeting of the minds," Planned Parenthood threw a tantrum and threw Komen under the bus.</span></span></h6><h6 class="uiStreamMessage" data-ft="{"type":1}" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}">It was nothing short of bullying to drag Komen through the mud for denying grants in amounts that total a fraction of 1% of Planned Parenthood's annual budget! </span></span></h6><h6 class="uiStreamMessage" data-ft="{"type":1}" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}">When Komen stepped back from their "no" as a result of this bullying, they too lost credibility. How can you effectively advocate for women struggling to overcome breast cancer--who need all the strength, courage and fighting spirit they can muster--when you don't have enough backbone to say "no" and mean it? </span></span></h6><h6 class="uiStreamMessage" data-ft="{"type":1}" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><br />
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</span></span></h6>Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-56262489485334787572012-01-07T09:55:00.000-08:002012-01-07T09:55:13.898-08:00Will Amazon Kill Off Public Libraries?Years ago, when I was looking for something to read, I'd go to the library and browse the shelves. I don't do that much any more. Today, I go to Amazon, figure out what books I'd like to read (I have about 20 authors whom I follow), and go online to see if the library has the book. If so, I electronically reserve it. I get an email telling me when it's available, and I go pick it up. I return the book via the drive-by drop off box.<br />
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This means that I am as intimately involved in my public library as I am in the drive-thru fast food restaurants I patronize much too often.<br />
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What does this mean for the future of libraries? I KNOW I'm not the only person who does this. In fact, when I electronically reserve a book, I'm usually in line behind 10 or more people who seem to using the library in the same way I am.<br />
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And, if that's not impersonal enough, Amazon now has a Prime membership (which I got for Christmas) that lets me borrow one book a month (for my Kindle, which I've posted that I love). For less that $80, I get access to 12 bestsellers a year immediately when I'm ready to read them. No waiting.<br />
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Just about all the "serious" readers I know, those who read 20 or more books/year, have Kindles or Nooks or those apps on their Smartphones. For us, the public library is a free alternative to getting books that we'd have to otherwise pay for. As the prices of ebooks decline and savy marketers find ways to get ebooks on our devices quicker and cheaper than driving to the library, there is less of an incentive for us to borrow from bricks and mortar. <br />
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But what about research? Does anybody ever really use the library instead of the Internet any more for research--at least those not in college? My kids write term papers all the time. They never go to the library. The journals they need are online and free. Other than academics, it's hard for me to imagine that any "knowledge" I need for my day-to-day life cannot be found online, for free, while I surf and eat my lunch.<br />
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What does this mean for libraries? I've thought about this a lot. When I do my quick visits, the patrons are: (1) People of limited means who are "hanging out;" (2) People using the free computers; (3) People reading the magazines; (4) Mothers with little kids borrowing tons of kids' books.<br />
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It used to be EVERYBODY loved libraries, or at least the idea of libraries.Will our communities fund libraries, as they have in the past, to keep the above patrons happy? I don't think so. This makes me a bit sad. <br />
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SO, I believe the future of the public library is bleak, unless there is a lot of energy injected into them and the libraries themselves are willing to "think outside the book" in serving patrons. I too love the idea of a public library, but in fact, the library hasn't engaged me for quite a while.<br />
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That's just the way it is, not the way I'd like it to be.<br />
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Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-44920845699603808392012-01-04T14:52:00.000-08:002012-01-04T14:52:47.936-08:00My Presidential Election PredictionsA few folks have asked me how I see things--so here is a summary, and why.<br />
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For me, it's simply a numbers game. The following isn't my idea of what "should" happen, but what I believe WILL happen unless there is a major intervening event to shake the world up. <br />
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Republican nominee: probably Romney, but it really doesn't matter. I can't see any scenario in which Obama is NOT reelected.<br />
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Why?<br />
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In the US, right-to-life, traditional marriage and conscience issues don't move enough voters to vote for candidates based on those issues alone. That's just the fact. It is also the fact that candidates who run on those issues are ineffective and/or uninterested in implementing policies affecting those issues when elected. Example: George Bush 1--how long did it take for him to get a partial birth abortion ban in place?<br />
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Assumption: 40% of voters will vote for ANYBODY the Republicans nominate. 40% of the voters will vote for ANYBODY the Democrats nominate. The real battle is for the 20% who are open to voting otherwise. I just don't see Romney or any other Republican candidate getting 11% of that vote.<br />
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Regarding the role of the Electoral College in all of this--I know many people in the "swing" states, and I believe I know what's on their minds at least as well as the pundits. Also, I've actually lived in one of those states for a number of years. I still can't see the numbers swinging enough to favor a Republican candidate.The math does not compute.<br />
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BUT--what about the economy? If you think it stinks, you probably aren't interested in voting for a party who is perceived as being really tough on the unemployed. <br />
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HOWEVER, I believe the economy doesn't really stink, and the prospects are good. Evidence: my 401K from a previous job was flat (not going up or down) in 2011, and has recovered from 2008.There is a lot of cash sitting out there waiting for investment opportunity. It won't sit for much longer. I'm bullish on 2012. What about Europe? I believe Germany will keep everybody in line, but even if they fail, the troubled countries are such a minuscule part of the global economy that they can't take the world down--some banks, perhaps, but not the world. The numbers just aren't there. That would be like South Dakota (a state I really love--no offense here), driving the US economy. It just doesn't add up.<br />
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Yes, some folks are underwater in their mortgages, and far too many are unemployed and stressed financially. And how is that good for Republicans? It's not, see above. <br />
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SO given that few voters actually vote on the USCCB's five critical issues (that's just the way it is, not how I'd like it to be) AND the economy is good, which is good for Obama, OR the economy is bad, which is also good for a party that is perceived as being "nicer" in hard times, I just don't see any Republican winning.Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-64805030395845428742011-12-06T06:06:00.000-08:002011-12-06T06:06:10.141-08:00The Ninety-Nine Left Behind<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:TrackMoves/> <w:TrackFormatting/> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:DoNotPromoteQF/> <w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther> <w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian> <w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:DontGrowAutofit/> <w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/> <w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/> <w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/> <w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/> <w:Word11KerningPairs/> <w:CachedColBalance/> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> <m:mathPr> <m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/> <m:brkBin m:val="before"/> <m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/> <m:smallFrac m:val="off"/> <m:dispDef/> <m:lMargin m:val="0"/> <m:rMargin m:val="0"/> <m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/> <m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/> <m:intLim m:val="subSup"/> <m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/> </m:mathPr></w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<div class="MsoNormal">Reflection based on Matthew 18:12-14 (Published in the Advent <i>Magnificat</i> 2003)</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;"><span> </span>“If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them goes astray, will he not leave the ninety-nine in the hills and go in search of the stray?” </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0.5in;">Our Church is blessed by many who consistently and dependably do God’s will every day. They are the ninety-nine sheep, trusted by the Good Shepherd to do His work until He returns. </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0.5in;">The obituary of a friend described him as a lifelong “good Catholic.” He was a man of character, who practiced kindness without fanfare. His steadfast faith and charity as a husband, father, soldier and businessman transformed daily tasks into holy works that touched the lives of others.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;"><span> </span><span> </span>For the past eight years, I have volunteered in my parish’s RCIA program, where adults prepare to join the Catholic Church. When I ask what attracts them to Catholicism, they almost always cite the quiet example of a friend, co-worker or family member who is a “good Catholic” in the midst of mundane, everyday responsibilities. They see in this “ordinary” Catholic a solid foundation for growing in holiness, and want that for their own lives.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;"><span> </span>Few of us will be called to do spectacular deeds in the name of Christ. However, when we bring Christ to the everyday work we do, we may witness spectacular results. </div>Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-23277280906373786342011-12-03T08:11:00.000-08:002011-12-03T08:11:39.411-08:00The Gift and Investment of TimeMy novel, <i>The Saintmaker</i>, has been receiving some good reviews. Thanks to all who have taken the time to read it.<br />
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Time is the greatest gift you can give an author. We don't mind the royalty money, but any good author is driven by love of the written word and the passion to tell a good story. Time is what we pour into our work, and receiving that gift back is the best payoff of all.<br />
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The older I get, the more I treasure this gift, or investment, of time. As long as you are healthy, you can make more money. However, we all have a limited amount of time on earth, and none of us know how much we have left. Reading a book is taking a risk and using up something that will run out.<br />
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That fact alone makes me SO grateful to anybody who takes the time to read my book. You are giving nine or ten hours of your life to me. Whether you love the book, hate it, or are somewhere in between, that is time you will never get back. Thank you. I hope your time was a good investment.<br />
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I tried very hard to write the kind of book I would like to read. I miss the authors I enjoyed, who either passed on or are unable to write any longer. I welcome and encourage other mystery writers, who love the genre and their faith, to join me. Please get writing!<br />
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To read a review of <i>The Saintmaker</i>, please see <a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Saintmaker-ebook/dp/B005W7KEHK">Amazon</a> or <a href="http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-saintmaker-mary-carroll-patrick/1107044617?ean=2940032814405&itm=1&usri=the+saintmaker">Barnes and Noble.</a>Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-89621147245153515742011-12-01T07:54:00.000-08:002011-12-01T07:54:22.658-08:00Fundraising 101My day job is to help raise money for a Catholic campus ministry, so the following is influenced by my experience. During this time of year, when we are often inundated with requests to give to worthy causes, I'd like to explain a few things about fundraising that I didn't know before I actually did it for a living. <br />
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<ul><li>It takes money to make money. As much as I'd love to think that all the world is interested in my worthy cause, if they don't know about what we do and the impact we have on the Church and world, they won't give. Hence, appeal letters, newsletters, websites, etc. Even though we are good stewards, we can't get all this done for free. The real metric isn't how much the organization spends on fundraising, but how much these communications instruments further the mission of the organization.</li>
<li>People, rightly so, feel good when they help others. My job is to invite folks to partner with us in the good we do. They, of course, can say "yes" or "no." My job is to merely ask.</li>
<li>Some of the most beautiful fundraising instruments are the least effective. I've learned not to go for classy, take-your-breath-away graphics unless they will impact the bottomline. A wonderful example of this principle in action are the tacky, tasteless used car commercials on TV. They work in selling cars, which is what they are meant to do. It's okay that they aren't great art.</li>
<li>There is a role for volunteers and a role for paid staff. It is a rare volunteer who is willing to totally take responsibility for a project and meet a hard deadline no matter what. If you find one of them, they are a treasure. The more typical volunteer (and we love them!) wants to help, but they offer this help without the commitment to "own" the results. If you have a project where something needs to be done on time, within a strict budget and done regardless of whether your car is in the shop or your kid is sick, you better have a staff person involved.</li>
<li>Finally, we are all in this world together, and there is so much good work to be done. My organization's mission WILL appeal to many, but not all. That's okay. God has a pile of work for each of us to do. Our job is to find this pile and get working! </li>
</ul>Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-47774575893930186882011-11-24T06:04:00.000-08:002011-11-24T06:04:58.457-08:00What I'm Thankful ForWell, our family planned to go to Mass today and take a bit of time to thank God for all of our blessings. BUT my daughter woke up with a hurting elbow, and it took us quite awhile to get her back to sleep, and then us back to sleep.<br />
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So, although this is a poor substitute for the thanksgiving of the Eucharist, I thought I'd just give a random list of things, small and great, for which I'm thankful.<br />
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<ul><li>That all of my aches and pains are just that--nothing more. I can lead my life, and do the things I'm called to do and want to do.</li>
<li>That my family is healthy.</li>
<li>That I have a husband and kids who love me and whom I love.</li>
<li>That we have a home and enough to eat.</li>
<li>That my husband and I have jobs we love and that let us make a difference in the lives of others.</li>
<li>That our kids are doing fine--in school and in life.</li>
<li>That I hit the "lottery" of life when it came to getting good parents. Although they are now in eternal life and I miss them every day, I am enriched by their love and what they taught me.</li>
<li>That we didn't spend money on landscaping before realized that the Texas drought was going to be going on for awhile.</li>
<li>That I can still fit into my pants even though I've gained a few pounds.</li>
<li>That my car can get me where I need to go.</li>
<li>That I have several books on my "must read" list to look forward to.</li>
<li>That I can watch the parade right now, and the Texas A&M vs. Texas football game tonight on the big screen.</li>
</ul>For these and so many other blessings, I'm truly thankful.Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-26273301381544904332011-11-22T08:05:00.000-08:002011-11-22T08:05:47.872-08:00Wal-Mart Has it RightOne thing I've learned in my dealings with the poor and disadvantaged: when facing a problem, they often lack resources and options. If I were ever short of cash, I have a lot of friends and family members who'd help me out. I'd do the same for them. But what if everybody else I knew was also financially challenged? Perhaps the only choice I'd have would be to use a payday lender or face eviction. What looks like a foolish decision becomes one of survival.<br />
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Those of us who use the banks have noticed that we are being "fee-d to death." When Citibank recently sent a letter informing us that we had to maintain a certain large balance or face a $15 monthly charge, we bolted to our friendly credit union. Just like us, the poor and disadvantaged, who want to responsibly use banking services, are bolting to keep more of their hard-earned money in their pockets, or rather, on their debit cards. Enter Wal-Mart.<br />
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<a href="http://www.wbur.org/npr/142599130/wal-mart-lures-bank-customers-frustrated-by-fees">Wal-Mart is providing fixed-cost, modestly priced debit cards</a>. Of course owners of the cards are more likely to shop at Wal-Mart, but they don't have to. They can use the cards in other places and online.<br />
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Yes, I know it's fashionable to decry Wal-Mart as the "big box" that is ruining Main Street, but Main Street banks were more than willing to exploit the poor and not-so-poor with fees. Wal-Mart saw a need, and met this need at a reasonable price. They are good at that. Kudos Wal-Mart.Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-71256570448309914052011-11-01T07:45:00.000-07:002011-11-01T07:45:21.650-07:00All Saints Day and Happy Birthday!Today is just one of those days when my emotions are all over the place. <br />
<ol><li>It's the birthday of my fantastic daughter (and saint-in-progress), Anna. She's 18 today, a legal adult in the US, and I'm just not sure how to feel about that.</li>
<li>It's the day when I, both personally and along with the universal Church, honor my relatives who are the uncanonized saints, most particularly my own mother.</li>
</ol>Yes, you may think it's a bit presumptuous to believe, as much as I believe anything, that I have some saints in my family tree, but I do. I do pray for them and will pray for them tomorrow (All Souls Day) too. I'm sure God understands me hedging my bets.<br />
<br />
A little about both:<br />
<br />
At 10:10 a.m. on November 1, I gave birth to Anna. She's been a blessing to our family in two ways. First, she's given us great joy, (humble) pride, wonder in how such a great kid came from us, and a sense of hope for the future. She taught us to see the world with the eyes of a child, where everything is a toy, and everything has potential and wonder. I can't wait to see how life turns out for her.<br />
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She's also a blessing in another way--like most kids, she gave us a laboratory of "virtue development." She made us PhD and Masters Degree educated parents realize that there's a lot we don't know. She taught two "professionals," respected in their fields, who thought they could control a lot in how their day-to-day lives unfolded, that control is an illusion.<br />
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She also taught us that we were tougher than we ever thought possible, but we were still no match for her. For example, Anna NEVER slept. It was amazing. Okay, she did sleep, but it was in 20 minute increments scattered throughout the day. We read every book, tried every trick, etc. to get that kid to sleep longer. I went home and cried in envy when a friend said that her son woke up every three hours and it drove her crazy. I couldn't remember the last time I had that much sleep at one time.<br />
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When I showed our pediatrician Anna's sleep log, he too was amazed. Anna was just fine. We just had to surrender. Lesson learned--there are just some things you can't control. You have to accept the way things are, the way people are, and live with it. You CAN live with just about anything if you know it won't last forever. This too shall pass, and it did. We could choose to have the sound of a crying baby in our house 24/7, or we could carry her around, doze when she did and just make the best of it. That's what we did. <br />
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We learned to keep our mouths shut when well-meaning people gave us their advice on how to make our kid sleep, how to get the baby to relax (yeah--like we hadn't thought of that). We learned that the tenacity and persistence Anna exhibited as a baby are only annoying BECAUSE she was a baby. Those same qualities have served her well in school, sports and life-in-general. Looking back, I'm glad she was tougher than we were back then. <br />
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And today--well rousting a teenager out of bed can be a different kind of challenge too.<br />
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I can't let this blog about Anna pass without saying a few words about my mother, who began her own journey in eternal life almost three years ago. I miss her every day, but there are times that I hear her voice coming out of Anna's mouth. The genes run true there! It's a comfort to know that the qualities I loved about her (and some that I didn't) will be a part of my life as long as I have my daughter.<br />
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Happy All Saints Day, Mom; and Happy Birthday, Anna. I love you both so much.Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-80520120444758422592011-10-25T09:33:00.000-07:002011-10-25T09:33:39.357-07:00Why Bookstores will DieI sent a very polite email to a book reviewer asking her to consider reviewing <a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Saintmaker-ebook/dp/B005W7KEHK">The Saintmaker</a>, my Catholic genre mystery novel. She emailed me back saying that as a mystery bookseller she was offended by my linking to an online site where the book was available. <br />
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First, I didn't realize she sold books; and if I had, I wouldn't have linked to Amazon--I'm not totally insensitve. I read a lot of books, both print and e-versions. I can't remember the last time I actually walked into a bookstore and bought one. Coffee, yes; books, no. This doesn't make me a bad person, but rather one who is in the midst of a changing business model.<br />
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This bookseller <em>should </em>feel threatened. The bookstore model of business just doesn't work very well right now, and won't work at all much longer. It's not working for authors (the suppliers). It's not working for the stores, who have become "showrooms" for on-line purchases.<br />
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Why?<br />
<ul><li>Authors want to make more money. Look at the price of your favorite print book. The author's cut is probably between 10-15%. That means a whole lot of books must sell for the author to make real (quit your day job) money. It takes a long time to write a good book. The $ just aren't there to justify this effort for 10% of the take.</li>
<li>With technology, more authors will take their knowledge, passion and expertise and make it work for themselves, especially through ebooks. An author can publish an ebook and keep 60-75% of the take. All the services that a publisher provides an individual author can "buy": editing, cover design, marketing and publicity, and still be better off. Publishers have been whining for at least 15 years about how hard their business is and why they have to keep a firm hand on royalties, but I'll leave that for another blog post on another day.</li>
<li>Consumers are liking ebooks more and more, and are "pushing back" at the higher sticker prices of printed versions. If I pay $20 for a print book and don't like it, I feel cheated. If I pay $5.99 for an ebook and don't like it, I'm annoyed. If I pay $5.99 for an ebook and love it, I feel like a savy consumer who found a great bargain.</li>
<li>And, the author of the $5.99 ebook is making more money on that consumer's happiness (or annoyance) too. This is a win-win. If somebody doesn't like my book, I'd rather have them be mad at me at the $5.99 level than the $20 level.</li>
<li>Through recent incentives to authors, online ebook publishing sites are causing them to consider dumping traditional publishers. For example, for books with a price point less than $10, Amazon will offer the author 70% royalties on ebooks. What author in her right mind wouldn't jump at that vs. 10-15% of the print price?</li>
<li>The nostalgia for books is fading fast. My kids are used to doing research, reading and socializing on-line or with their smart phones. That's their world. Assuming that most of our kids are going to outlive us, 30 years from now they won't be reading paper books. Yes, there will always be a few who like "the old ways," but certainly not enough to sustain the current bookselling business models.</li>
<li>Green, green, green. E-books are green. Enough said.</li>
</ul>So, to my offended bookseller, you better have an exit strategy. You won't be making money selling books much longer, if indeed you are now. You are right to feel threatened, and I'm sorry I accidentally rubbed your nose in it.<br />
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<strong>Shameless self-promotion:</strong> You can get The Saintmaker for less than $5.99, less than $4.99, less than $3.99. Yes, that's right, for $2.99 you can get a mystery that you will either love, be annoyed with, or be somewhere in between. Such a bargain. <a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Saintmaker-ebook/dp/B005W7KEHK">Click here to order for the Kindle Version,</a> <a href="http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/96175">Click here for other ebook versions.</a>Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-26497861436802475702011-10-22T10:00:00.000-07:002011-10-22T10:00:11.927-07:00Movie Review: The Mighty Macs, a Chick Flick of a Different KindLast night my daughter's high school basketball team and I went to see <strong>The Mighty Macs</strong>. A quick plot summary: a small, underfunded Catholic college women's basketball team goes on to become the national champs. I heard the movie referred to as "Hoosiers for Girls," and while it is a compelling story, the adrenaline rush just wasn't there.<br />
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Yet, <strong>The Mighty Macs</strong> is a nice chick flick of a different kind. It shows a happily married woman (Cathy Rush, who sadly got divorced in later life) determined to help other young women live their dreams without trying to "find themselves" through a series of relationships that leaves them empty and unfulfilled--over and over again. <br />
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The movie is also a reminder to young women about how really tough it was to be a female athlete only a few short years ago (1970s). Today's athletes enjoy so many more advantages simply because our "foremothers" loved their sport so much that they didn't let inferior equipment, early morning practice times, lack of school support, and ugly uniforms keep them from playing. Although The Mighty Macs won, they represent countless other foremothers who played high school and college sports and didn't win championships. Today's athletes, including my daughter, reap their legacy. <br />
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<strong>Another contribution the movie makes</strong>: The Mighty Macs show that strong women, whether they be the nuns, Cathy Rush, the team, or the alumni supporters, can be faith-filled and feminine, and still get the job done.<br />
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SO--if you have young women in your life, athletes or not, an outing to see the Mighty Macs is a fun lesson. Showing up, working hard, and believing don't guarantee that your dreams will come true, but NOT doing these things will give you a life of regrets.Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1726139557322864694.post-74027390163614040412011-10-09T11:38:00.000-07:002011-10-09T11:38:02.827-07:00A bit of Purgatory for a Good CauseYesterday I dedicated two hours to the "Ethics and Integrity" training that the diocese requires for anybody in just about any ministry. Well, I think if your ministry involves only healthy, physcially and mentally fit adults, then you can get an exemption. Otherwise, you have to attend full-scale training once, and a "refresher course" every three years. <br />
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I hated that I had to spend time learning about sexual abuse, even though I am not and never was an abuser. I hated to be reminded of the the minority of priests who broke the sacred trust the faithful placed in them, and the majority of blameless and dedicated priests who have suffered because of the scandal. I expecially hated that the session reminded me that the majority of bishops (yes, that's right, a majority of the successors to the apostles in the US) were in some way complicit in enabling these priests to abuse our children. Well--that fact was not highlighted in the training, but I was reminded of this, not in a "holding grudge" kind of way, but in a "we must never allow this to happen again" kind of way.<br />
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Yet, if we want to ensure that abuse never happens again to a child or vulnerable adult, all of us in ministry must be trained to learn the signs of abuse, the appropriate and inappropriate behaviors regarding children or vulnerable adults, and what to do if we become aware that something just isn't right. <br />
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The training is all about the kids and those who can't take care of themselves, and making sure that the Church is a welcoming and safe place for them--not about me, my comfort level, or the little sacrifice I made to attend. The training also reminded me that I can be aware of what's going on around me without treating priests, friends in faith, and ministry partners with suspician.<br />
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Not my favorite way to spend a Saturday morning, but it was the right thing to do. However, I'm still shallow enough to hope that I racked up at least a few purgatory bonus points.Mary Carroll Patrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17621535092657150756noreply@blogger.com0